The Thing About Love

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By Bernadette A. Sahm

The thing about love is that it can be infinite as we can love as much and as many as we choose to love. If one love dies, we can still love again. In April when we lost Chipper our hearts were broken, we loved him so much and in June of 2018 we lost Happy and were deeply saddened too. Yet in mid-May 2022 we brought Bailey and Buddy into our hearts and our home. They aren’t Happy nor Chipper as they have their own unique Bichon Frise personalities. We love them as they are and for who they are.

When I look back on my life and on all my relationships, I can’t help but reflect on the positive loving relationships I had as opposed to those that were a lot less than loving. The big thing that stands out the most is the simple fact; we can love as much, and we can love as many as we so desire. There are no limits!

Whatever life losses I may have experienced, I was blessed to fill those voids with other loving relationships. Other mothers and other friends who became mothers and sisters for me. Each and every departure made space for new opportunities to love.

On August 1st my husband Brian and I celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary, there is more love today than ever before. We survived much together and came out stronger and with a deeper bond. In our over 30 years together, we raised three children, one set of twins and made a home with five dogs. We gained in love, and we lost in love, it didn’t change us. By nature, we are caring and loving people. We are givers and doers and live life fully. The greatest gift in being widowed so young, for the both of us, was learning just how quickly life can change. In an instant, life can change forever. We appreciate every single day, we know that every day is a gift, a gift from God.

My husband and I also experienced those difficult and unloving relationships, the ones that teach us about what we don’t want or like in our lives. Our past relationships prepared us for our relationship. The Buddhist teachings about love “accepting a partner for who they are, for who they are throughout their life no matter what changes and making the best of every situation is how one achieves personal fulfillment in a romantic relationship.” The idea of unconditional love is essentially what Buddhism teaches.

We all want to be loved and accepted. We all want the same thing. Maybe just maybe if we focused on loving instead of fear, hatred and division, we would receive more love and radiate more love toward others.

Lyrics from a Gary Allan song titled; Like It’s a Bad Thing … “I don’t know about you, but I was put here to live and love. So, what if I don’t do it like everybody else.”

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

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