Month: October 2015

Life and Death

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Life and Death
By Bernadette A. Moyer

Well it’s not life and death, is it? That was my line which used to be my litmus test in every serious situation and most often it wasn’t life and death. So that was the first screen used to diffuse the situation.

Is it “life and death?”

Over the summer a longtime friend from my real estate days when we became Realtors and real estate partners in the mid-1980’s learned that she has breast cancer. Her decisions now are based on “life and death” as her first series of radiation and chemo did not rid her of the cancer. Now she is facing a double mastectomy.

The last time I saw her was at our beach property as she was going out on the dock and onto her family boat with her husband and adult children, their spouses and children. She was so happy. She told me about her new business that she owned and was operating. Every single year we receive their family Christmas cards complete with the entire family photo.

She was living the dream! Then one day she was literally stopped in her tracks now making life and death decisions. She is humbled, asking for help and for support and facing a serious next leg of her life journey.

A few days ago our Governor here is Maryland made statements stating that during all his chemo treatments for his cancer, how he was inspired and repeatedly listened to Tim McGraw’s song; Live Like You Were Dying.

“When that moment came that stopped me on a dime, And I spent most of the next days, Looking at the x-rays, And talking ‘bout the options, talking ‘bout sweet time” (Live Like You Were Dying, Tim Nichols and Craig Wiseman)

I think most people, myself included, live like we have an endless amount of days ahead of us and yet we all have a limited time here. Unless of course death and an illness or other tragedy hit us and then we think about our “life and death” decisions.

Death is the ultimate teacher, the one that forces us to look at our own mortality. It is a chance to find our hearts and connect our souls … again.

“And I loved deeper and I spoke sweeter. And I gave forgiveness I’d been denying. And he said one day I hope you get a chance to live like you were dying.” (Live Like You Were Dying)

Imagine if we all lived like we were dying and like it was our last days? How would we spend them? What have we put off that is important to us and yet we haven’t taken the time?

Who should we be more loving toward and who needs our forgiveness? I write about it often, my own mantra, “Life is for the living, live it!”

Please pray for my friend Lenore and all those facing life and death decisions …

NEW BOOKS! Along The Way and Another Way both on Amazon and Barnes and Noble
Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
http://www.bernadetteamoyer.wordpress.com

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Everyone Has “A Story”

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Everyone Has “A Story”
By Bernadette A. Moyer

Everyone has a story! We all do! They say, “Writers are observers of life.” Every few months if not every month I hear from someone that thinks they want to write and they have a “story.” They have a story to share. Usually it is about something they experienced and learned from and wish to share with other people.

I think we all crave a “connection” the ability to connect to others and find common ground and share. We are all more alike than not. That is probably why I have a hard time when people do things to others that they wouldn’t want done to themselves. But that is another story.

When I am approached my answer is always the same, “just write! Jump in and start!” For most of us our “story” is already written we just need to get it down and share it. Often times the hardest part is the jumping off point and just getting started. Most often I find after starting is just flows and takes on a life of its own. It is for me, a truly organic process.

I also ask the same question, “Who is your target market audience?” If you are writing for yourself that is a diary or a journal. If you are planning to write your story and you wish to share it with an audience, who is that audience? What group of people will read your written work? What do you wish to accomplish by writing and then sharing?

Most everyone can relate to someone else and their experiences. We are not alone. There isn’t something that has happened that someone else hasn’t already experienced but the difference might be how we handled it and what we learned from it. Can we now inspire another person with our writings and our story, our life experience?

I have also heard it said that you need to have a certain amount of life experiences that most often come with age, until you really have something to write about and that is worthy of sharing. I always encouraged my kids to write. Many times they would ask me, “But what should I write about?” I always had a list that I could just rattle off things like 1) what is feels like to be a twin 2) what it feels like to know that your birth mother died and you never got to know her? 3) What you had to do to become an Eagle Scout 4) baking your first cake 5) first dates and the list goes on and on.

We all have “a story” and we all have something we can share. Stephen King wrote a book years ago titled, On Writing that I found helpful. I also used to read books about marketing your story and your book. There is no greater high for a writer than to be read, to be understood and to have that reader connect. I have often said, “That is my paycheck” when someone reads me, gets me and can connect to me from something I have written and shared.

There is a lot of healing for many people in writing, I, myself included and everyone has their own form. I think of it as an art form, the way we express ourselves and how and what we share. Just like an artist with a painting. That art makes you feel something and it is an expression from the artist. Writing to me, is that same experience. It should make you feel something.

So here is to all the writers out there that have a story to share, my advice, just write! Jump in and just get started, you never know where it will lead until you write it! Write!

http://www.bernadetteamoyer.wordpress.com and http://www.bernadetteamoyer.com
New Book! Along The Way available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble
Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

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My Maryland!

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My Maryland!
By Bernadette A. Moyer

Some of the best things about Maryland is that we have it all here, literally known as “America in Miniature” because so much is here in our 10,460 square miles of land and water. We have the ocean and we have the horse farms and we have the best crab cakes you will ever eat.

Our state is diverse with ethnic groups of every origin. Maryland is also called the “Free State” because of Maryland’s long tradition of political freedom and religious tolerance. There is money here and part of Maryland is so close to Washington D.C. that many end up living here who are involved in politics.

Annapolis Maryland is the capital of Maryland and the county seat of Anne Arundel County. And Annapolis is known as “America’s Sailing Capital” and home to the United States Naval Academy.

Marylanders are proud of their home grown corn and tomatoes. The annual Preakness is held here in Baltimore for 140 years now and is the second leg of the Triple Crown after the Kentucky Derby and before the Belmont Stakes.

Baltimore City, Maryland is the home of the professional baseball team with the Baltimore Orioles and with professional football in the Baltimore Ravens; we have two state of the art stadiums with Oriole Park at Camden Yards and M&T Stadium. Oriole Park recently won yet another award as the #1 baseball stadium in the league because of its design.

The Inner Harbor in Baltimore City continues to be a tourist destination with a water taxi system and paddle boats among other water vessels. The views from Harbor East include beautiful homes, walkways, docks, piers and boats.

Little Italy retains its “old world charm” with many fine Italian restaurants, pizzerias and bakery. The brick sidewalks and tight little streets are home to several Catholic Italian festivals every single year.

We are not without great theater and museums either with The Baltimore Lyric Opera House, The Walters Art Museum and Baltimore Museum of Art. Currently the series VEEPS and House of Cards is being filmed here in Baltimore. Classics movies like Diner, Tin Men, Cry-Baby … And Justice For All and many more have been filmed here in Maryland.

Today there are currently 55 colleges and universities in the state of Maryland. Top ranking schools like University of Maryland, Johns Hopkins University, Towson University and Goucher College are not just home grown favorites but draw students from across the country and internationally.

We have really good hospitals here too with Johns Hopkins Hospital, University of Maryland Hospital, Mercy Medical Center, Kennedy Krieger Institute and the Greater Baltimore Medical Center and others. People come from all over the world for Johns Hopkins Hospital.

Maryland has been home to many famous people like Cal Ripken Jr, Michael Phelps, Jada Pinkett Smith, Toni Braxton, David Hasselhoff, Edgar Allan Poe, Montell Williams, Linda Hamilton, Tom Clancy, Frank Zappa, Barry Levinson, John Waters, Frank Perdue and others.

But it really is about the everyday people that make Maryland so special, people that have that balance of pride and humility and most have a desire to succeed and to do better for themselves and their families.

My husband was born and raised here; he has lived in Baltimore City and now resides in Baltimore County. After 35 years he retired from the City of Baltimore. Like most native Marylanders he is proud of his home teams in the Orioles and Ravens and a huge fan of both teams. He is Maryland through and through.

Me, I am a transplant from Pennsylvania but have called Maryland “home” for over 32 years now. We are well travelled and we have flirted with moving out-of-state but truth is that my Maryland is our Maryland and we are happy here and then again why wouldn’t we be with a tagline like “America in Miniature” we believe that we have the best of all worlds and we have it all here in Maryland!

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
NEW BOOK! Along The Way available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

Photo by my friend, author, artist, photographer, beloved teacher and
fellow Marylander Rus VanWestervelt

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A Snap Shot

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A Snap Shot
By Bernadette A. Moyer

It’s that wonderful time of year again when all the trees are changing colors and the air is crisp and clean and you just want to enjoy the outdoors and take it all in before winter weather arrives.

I walked to our corner mailbox to drop a few letters inside and at the mailbox I looked across the street and witnessed one of the most beautiful orange leaves on a big tree that had turned colors. The sun was streaming through it. I wanted to capture the moment and grabbed for my cell phone as I stood there and clicked away at taking a few pictures.

At this same time a lady from our neighborhood walked by with her dog and said, “Oh wow taking a selfie at the mailbox for Happy and Chipper?” I laughed and waved her off as my husband had just appeared to pick me up since we were headed out together for the day.

Then I quickly turned to her and said, “No selfie actually look at that beautiful tree, that tree was what I was taking pictures of …”

Sometimes we see something and we think we know what we are seeing when in fact our snap shot view isn’t correct. We presume to know.

Recently we went on a trip out of town when my son sent me a picture of the house and front yard. I thought he was showing me that he cut the grass. My response was “good.” Little did he know that I missed the message, or did I know at the time he was showing me that the contractor we hired had come by and installed new hand rails.

I totally missed it. What my son was sharing was not at all the snap shot that I had in my mind. Sometimes we totally miss the picture and in doing so miss the message.
We are often so quick to glean our own conclusions that we totally miss what is actually happening. We think we see something that we totally missed and in our snap shot view we may get it wrong.

One of my favorite phrases is “suspend judgement” wait until we have the total picture before coming to any conclusions. What we think we see in a “snap shot” moment just may not be the complete and total picture, and it may not capture the entire story …

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
NEW BOOK! Along The Way available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble

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Pictures Down

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Pictures Down
By Bernadette A. Moyer

Most people that know me know that I am a positive and upbeat person always seeking and striving for the truth and for the lessons that were to be learned. We learn so much about ourselves when we are faced with challenges and when things don’t go the way that we had hoped they would go. But that is life, isn’t it?

Facing change and facing our challenges help to show our character and sometimes our lack of character too.

Not everything is going to end with a happy ending but that doesn’t mean that our happiness has to end. When we are willing to take the “pictures down” and to dream another dream and to go off in a new direction our hearts and our souls have the chance to grow and to love again.

Parents often have the hardest time with “pictures down” as if in defiance keeping that lost person alive by showing their photos will change the outcome of their departure. It doesn’t. We can reflect on our past memories and we can hold near and dear the love that was shared.

In the beginning I used to overly cherish my pictures of people that left my life because that was what I had left to hang on to and to validate that they existed. The pictures served as the witness. But they also serve as a chain that keeps us tethered to our past.

A new husband or a new wife typically doesn’t want to start a fresh new marriage with pictures of the person who came before them. We can respect those people and appreciate who they were and what they represented but to be present in our lives and to be fully aware and able to embrace our future we take the pictures down.

When my first child left home so unexpectedly and without a normal transition I was so hurt and so angry and most of all so deeply disappointed. I remember taking a collage of photos with her pictures and smashing the glass against a chair. It shattered just like our relationship. It would be the love of my husband that would come behind me and clean it up. That single act is so meaningful to me in so many ways. He saved me and he helped me to save myself.

If pictures make you happy and bring you peace they should be up and around but when a relationship hurts you and has come to its own conclusion it may be time for you to take the pictures down.

I have other photos and I have other memories but the pictures are down and they are boxed and put away. The pictures that we keep up are the ones that make us happy and they make us smile, they make us feel good to have them around. Pictures down and I am fine and good and happy again.

What are you keeping up that really should be taken down? What are you holding onto that is getting in the way of what should come next?

Who or what are you keeping out of the frame that really should be in there?
Think about “pictures down” and all that could take that same place and space in your life …

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
NEW BOOK! Along The Way available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble

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Homelessness and Poverty by Chance or by Choice

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Homelessness and Poverty by Chance or by Choice
By Bernadette A. Moyer

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Our news is flooded right now by the aftermath of Hurricane Sandy, many people have literally lost everything in losing all their worldly possessions and many have lost their homes. Surely they didn’t choose to have a natural disaster take their home and virtually render them homeless.

But what about a culture of people that exists in just about every inner city and is homeless? We learn that so much of the inner city homelessness can be traced back to alcohol and drug addictions and abuses and some of it stems from some form or combined forms of mental illness.

We have people in our cities that are living on the streets and they have no money, no food, no clothing and no shelter. Is it by their own doing or undoing? Or is it an inability to properly function due to a disease that may very well be beyond their control?

The very first time I witnessed homelessness I was in the sixth grade, only eleven or twelve years old when we went to see a show in New York City. A man was lying on the sidewalk with just one shoe and he appeared to be sleeping with people just walked right over him as though he wasn’t there and didn’t exist. I was from a small town in Pennsylvania and grew up on a farm; my eyes were wide by what I witnessed. Not only was he sleeping on the busy sidewalk but no one stopped, no one cared and no one seemed willing to help him. It left a lasting impression.

Most of us can’t imagine not having a home and we can’t imagine living in poverty and on the street without our basic needs being met. We think that it is as simple as a choice. We have always given to Paul’s Place, The Franciscan Center and Our Daily Bread, all located in Baltimore City that support homeless people with food, clothing and other services. Just one of this Center’s is supporting 500 people a day for a free hot meal. For some people this will be the only meal for the day. I was stunned to learn just how many individuals, men, women and children who are dependent on others to meet their basic human needs and require basic human services.

There was a time when I believed that to be truly homeless, a person must have burnt every single relationship from family to friends and beyond. But the reality for many is that it is a culture and a learned behavior that often passes from generation to generation. Getting up and getting out of poverty takes incredible strength, determination and courage and a support system of caring individuals. It takes courage to face a new and foreign way of life, one where they are willing and able to accept responsibility for themselves. This can be scary for some who never witnessed this modeled behavior.

What about the people who are struggling with a disability, a health issue and may never be in a position to work and afford to care for them and contribute to their family. Then there are the “working poor” people that have jobs yet it still does not translate into self-sufficiency.

The people that lost their homes to hurricane Sandy and to other natural disasters never anticipated that they could wake up one day and literally find themselves homeless. What would we do if a natural disaster destroyed our home, where would we go and who would help us out?

I have always viewed our country, the United States of America as a wealthy and “fat” country with so much abundance and with a true sense of generosity. There is no reason why we should have any single person, our brothers and our sisters should all have their basic needs met.

Most of us can pray and we can donate our time and our treasure to help those in need. As we approach the holiday season with Thanksgiving and Christmas and in the season of giving and gifting, let us not forget that many are doing without and that “To whom much has been given, much is expected.” Luke 12:48

Written 11/2/12

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
NEW BOOK! Along The Way available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble

Mind over Matter

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Mind over Matter
By Bernadette A. Moyer

If you don’t mind, it really doesn’t matter. It is amazing how freeing it is when you let go of what other people say and think about you. “What other people think about you is none of your business.” Paulo Coelho

What matters is what you think and feel and what you know about yourself. How we feel about ourselves shows itself in how we look, how we act and even how we react. There are many things in my life that I am most proud of and when I think of it, it isn’t about my achievements or my success but rather in all the times that I was true to myself.

I am most proud of the times when I stood up for myself and the times when I brushed off the actions and words of bullies and angry people; people that try and put their stuff on you. They want you to look bad so they can justify their own poor behaviors. It truly is mind over matter, if you don’t mind it really doesn’t matter!

During a three hour birthday celebration lunch just yesterday with my “other mother” who repeatedly told me how great I look and how beautiful I look and how happy I look, I had to smile and to laugh and to accept that I feel great! This woman has known me for over 20 years when I was her Real Estate agent. She is 80 years old and witnessed my life during some of the highest points and lowest ones too. Upon reflection, I know that I look good because I feel good because I have genuine peace in my heart and because I am surrounded by love.

The people in my circle are people that love and support me, period. I have cut out and I have deliberately cut off people and situations that cause undue drama and where I am no longer learning or growing or feeling good and happy. Life really is too short for other people’s sh –!

My most recent book Along The Way includes so many valuable lessons about life that I literally learned Along The Way, much of it was not so attractive and most of it came from the people that really should have been family and they should have been kind and loving. It just was not to be for me and for many years I struggled and I couldn’t accept it. I fought against the natural tide and the natural ebb and flow. Looking back I can see where this was a huge mistake and cost me much love and peace. I was looking for love and for acceptance in all the wrong places, looking for it outside of myself when it reality I have and I had everything I ever needed deep within myself, I always had God and a deep sense of faith. My life today is so good I want to get up and scream all about it!

I was getting in my own way of peace, love and happiness due to the unwarranted judgements of others, sad but true and truly a waste of time. I am so much bigger and better than that. For years I suffered in silence, feeling so much shame that related to my first family and later due to the untimely death of my husband, branding me a widow at 23 made me feel different than my peer group. Then later again feeling all the shame associated with abuse. I felt it so deeply and I initially took it all in and isolated myself. When the healing began I not only could speak about it but I wrote about it. This all helped me to heal. So did the thousands of connections I made with others by sharing my stories and my life experiences. Many of the most painful stories shared drew thousands of “likes” in just one platform; Facebook.

In one book Along The Way I bound all those lessons, the good, the bad, the happy and the sad. I am over it. I did the work. I grieved my losses and I moved on, parts of the book were written as far back as 1998. The entire book is past history and past lessons learned. Many people have shared with me how much my writings have helped them in their own life journey and for this I am eternally thankful.

Today I am in the midst of completing the next book titled; Another Way and it contains blogs, articles and essays that are happier and more fun and include more and different life lessons, experiences and observations. I have closed the door on all the hurtful stuff associated with my family of origin and opened the doors to much more love and peace and it shows on my face and in my heart.

Last week I turned 56 years old and I had another wonderful birthday celebrated in Las Vegas, Nevada. I have experienced so much Along The Way and today more than ever I know that there is Another Way … when things don’t go like you think they should, it really comes down to mind over matter and to seeking out a newer and better and Another Way … there is always Another Way …

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

New book! ALONG THE WAY available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

ANOTHER WAY coming out November 1, 2015

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Witness … Our Friends, Our Families and Our Partners

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Witness … Our Friends, Our Families and Our Partners

By Bernadette A Moyer

“We need a witness to our lives. There are a billion people on the planet … I mean, what does anyone life really means? But in a marriage, you’re promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things … all of it, all the time, every day. You’re saying “Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness.” (From the movie, Shall We Dance 2004)

My husband Brian and his mother Marie would go full circle, she would be there to greet him upon his arrival on his birth. He would hold her hand as she took her last breath here on earth. She witnessed his birth and he witnessed her death.
So many of us have re-connected with people from our past and managed to forge new relationships because of social networks like Facebook and professional ones like LinkedIn.

There is something so healthy and healing in having a history with someone. Someone special, who knows our past, is with us in the present and committed to us for the future. Having a 20 year history with my husband is a gift. We have shared the highest joys and the lowest sorrows together.

As a couple we really grew up in our 30’s, managed and maintained our family throughout our 30’s and 40’s and anticipate a renewal of couple hood now in our early 50’s. We have felt accomplished together and we have endured failures together as life partners, husband and wife. We have been blessed for the most part and managed to come out of most things hand in hand and stronger for the experiences both during the good times and the not so good ones. We are a witness to each other and give affirmation and confirmation on the life that we share together.

My friend Nick has come back into my life we first met in 1982 when I moved to Baltimore. We were young and it was the big fat 80’s of abundance. We worked hard in the restaurant business and we played hard together too. We had some of the best times together and this New Year 2012 we celebrated it together.

Nick is more than just a friend to me he is a witness, Nick was brave enough to vacation with me, my daughter, my mother and my sisters many years ago in Ocean City Maryland. His mother was my babysitter for my oldest daughter. Nick remembers her when she was just a tiny toddler and said, “Your daughter was the most beautiful little girl and you idealized her.” He was present in and out of our home, my mother’s home and his parents’ home. We share a significant past. We have memories. Our relationship is natural and easy and when we reconnected it was as if we never skipped a beat.

Through Facebook I have managed to establish and re-establish relationships with my classmates some from as far back as Marian Catholic high school class of 1977. This weekend I will happily travel to Delaware and “witness” JoAnn one of my classmates enter into a marriage. JoAnn and Chrissy are in love and committed to a life together, they will formalize their commitment in front of all their “witnesses.” I couldn’t be more honored to be included in their joy-filled celebration.

Yesterday I enjoyed a three hour lunch with my friend, mentor and “other mother” Priscilla. She has been there for me and my family at many life altering intervals. She was present when our twins began school and when our oldest graduated. She witnessed many family celebrations and listened with a loving heart when I shared many of my greatest accomplishments, heartaches and some of my disappointments. She has been my friend and another “witness” in my life.

Alicia was my neighbor and I met her when she was just a kid in elementary school about 20 years ago. We used to drive her to school; later she became my mother’s helper with our twins. I watched her evolve all through school until she graduated from high school and later college. She is an accomplished Montessori school teacher. I guess you could say I was just one “witness” in her life. I knew her as a little kid and today I am proud to call her my friend.

We all have many people in our life who have been a “witness” at one time or another and they bring to our life a sense of validation that without them we wouldn’t have.

Not so long ago I shared some childhood memories with my Uncle John and he said, “I knew about that” and other memories with my mother’s cousin Marianne who said, “that is how I remembered it too.” There is something so valuable and validating about sharing stories of the past with friends and family that were present just like you. We all want that witness to our life. To validate our time here on earth and we want to know that we mattered.

I flew down to Florida and spent a few days with a family member who recently said to me, “I knew you as a little girl and as a teenager; I’d like to get to know you as an adult.” I couldn’t wait to share time, memories and “witness” our current life together.

Most all of us are seeking some validation in life, a desire to know that we mattered and that our life had importance. It is through our friends, family members and spouses that we have a “witness.”

And like Susan Sarandon’s’ character Beverly Clark states in the movie, Shall We Dance, “Your life will not go unnoticed, because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness.”

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
NEW BOOK! Along The Way available at Amazon and Barnes & Noble #alongtheway

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The Good Stuff …Another 100 Things to Be Happy About!

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The Good Stuff … Another 100 Things to Be Happy About!
By Bernadette A. Moyer

My first 100 came so easy I thought I’d write another, we all have so much to be happy about! What is on your list?

1) Picking up your dogs after their grooming appointment
2) A big bowl of cut up fresh fruits
3) My husband washing and waxing my car because he wants to do it for me
4) An invitation to lunch
5) A perfect sunset
6) Family photos
7) Intelligent people
8) Successful people
9) When the first piece of pie comes out looking great
10) Your first snowball for the summer
11) Your favorite wine is on sale
12) Summer holidays of red, white and blue
13) Christmas shopping in July
14) Long road trips to fun locations
15) Taking the train to New York City
16) Neighborhood newspapers where you find really great community stories
17) The Amish market
18) In season ripe red tomatoes
19) New sneakers
20) Flat screen TV’s
21) Happy Hour at your neighborhood bar
22) The sermon that seems like it was written just for you
23) Connecting with new people
24) Books with hard covers and dust jackets
25) Love letters and cards that you have collected through the years from your spouse and re-reading them
26) A last minute invite and you are free to go
27) Fat juicy steamed crabs and pitchers of ice cold beer
28) Summer nights around the fire pit
29) Letting go and trusting in the universe and seeing just how healthy it is for you
30) Dorney Park
31) Grassy hilled properties with horses on them
32) Warm summer rains when you can walk around in it and be free just like when you were a kid
33) Catching a fish that is a keeper and having it for dinner
34) Picking your own blueberries
35) Growing fresh mint for your iced tea
36) Painting a room and it looks great
37) The smells of breakfast like bacon cooking and coffee brewing
38) My husband’s hugs
39) The old people in the neighborhood that stop by for a chat
40) Being asked to volunteer your time and talents
41) Red sandals
42) French manicures
43) Pretty new pedicures
44) Soft serve ice cream in a cone
45) Unexpected recognition for something that you do because you enjoy it
46) Funny people that make you laugh out loud
47) A direct flight that arrives on time
48) Postcards that arrive unexpectedly from other countries
49) Having your diamond ring steam cleaned
50) A gift and it isn’t even a holiday
51) Someone who makes food for you
52) Friends who can order for you because they remember how you like your steak cooked and how you like your drink prepared
53) Gay guy friends that are like the best girlfriends, fun!
54) Teachers that remember you from way back when
55) Old neighbors that you have kept up with
56) Model homes that are perfectly decorated
57) Pinterest pinning
58) The day you finish your novel and turn it over to your publisher
59) McCormick spices being made and waffling through the air like cinnamon
60) A massage
61) Handmade soaps
62) Long walks on the beach at twilight
63) The big screen movies
64) Hot soft pretzels
65) More gas than you remembered in the gas tank
66) Coin jars after a years of adding your extra change
67) Professional landscaping
68) A new desk chair that is comfy and stylish
69) Clean sidewalks and streets
70) Green full trees
71) Nighttime baseball games under the lights
72) Outdoor live concerts
73) Picnics in the park
74) Hot juicy fried chicken
75) Lunch at a popular restaurant and you know the owner who comes to see you
76) Visiting your former place of employment and people from all departments come to greet you
77) Free bumper stickers that you would have paid for
78) Early mornings when everyone is still in bed but you are accomplishing much
79) Inspirational speakers that leave you elevated
80) Good happy stories that make the news
81) A friends success
82) When good things happen for good people
83) Hydrangeas that are vibrant and bountiful like colored snowballs
84) Early morning walks on the beach when very few people are around
85) Air conditioned shopping on really hot days
86) Crisp clean new sheets
87) Perfectly white fluffy towels
88) Your own signature sangria that people rave about
89) A big pot of homemade soup
90) Stocking up your supply closet and stepping back to appreciate the abundance
91) Brand new appliances
92) Drawing out renovation plans and making something old like new again
93) Feedback that states your home shows “excellent” and is “adorable”
94) That moment when my husband comes home from work, and have missed each other
95) Watching how much the dogs love our son and how great he is with them
96) New makeup and using it for the first time
97) E-mails from friends with great news to share
98) Feeling at peace and really happy with yourself
99) Going to a wedding
100) A day at the beach … a week at the beach!
good-stuff

The Good Stuff … 100 Things to Be Happy About!

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The Good Stuff … 100 Things to Be Happy About!
By Bernadette A. Moyer

Everyone has “good stuff” in their life; here are the first 100 that came to me, my own list of “good stuff” what is on your list of good stuff?

My list of good stuff;

1) Getting to the bakery just when the Italian bread is coming out of the oven
2) Putting on last year’s white Capri pants and finding a $5 bill
3) Driving around the parking lot over and over and then happening on the very first parking spot
4) Arriving at the drycleaner in time to get same day service and there is no waiting in line
5) Waiting in the grocery line and you are three deep when the checker comes to get you and starts a new lane
6) Finding a dozen roses laying across your bed
7) Having a friend buy you a present that you always wanted but never would have afforded yourself
8) When your kids have grown up and they want to treat you to lunch and a movie
9) Running into an old friend you haven’t seen in years and they are just as happy to see you as you are to see them
10) Having a complete stranger open a door for you with a smile
11) When you least expect it and your husband wants to be with you doing normal everyday things like shopping and running errands
12) A friend from high school finds you on Facebook and you re-connect after more than 30 years
13) The checker at the grocery store says, “Whose mom are you? Because you are hot!”
14) Your favorite magazine arrives on the day you are looking for something new and fresh to read
15) Working toward a goal of 10,000 and immediately passing it by 700 more
16) Thinking about someone and they call you
17) Getting an interview and acing it
18) Old friends
19) New friends
20) Planning your vacation and the weather is absolutely perfect for all that you have planned
21) Making a chocolate cake and having everyone rave about how good it is
22) The greeting from your dog when you have been away all day long
23) When the people in your life tell you how much you mean to them
24) Getting a grant that will fund your novel
25) Having your teenager make your bed
26) Guessing at the frame size necessary for framing a piece of art and getting it right
27) Ordering a drink and it is better than you expected
28) Buying a new car
29) Buying a new car for less than the blue book value
30) Selling your home for three times what you purchased it for
31) Getting promoted when you never even asked for it
32) Being the top salesperson without really trying
33) Writing without interruptions
34) Having lunch with family you haven’t seen in years and it goes really well
35) A person who knows you well and defends you when you never even asked them to do it
36) Mentoring a young person and watching them become really successful
37) Buying a gift and the receiver absolutely loves it
38) Cooking filet mignon on the grill and it is cooked perfectly
39) Going back to school and getting all A’s in your classes
40) Buying a bathing suit that makes you look like you have lost 10 lbs.
41) The feeling of wearing the most comfortable yet stylish shoes
42) That online dress purchase that turns out to be a perfect fit and looks great on you
43) Pulling the lasagna out of the oven just when unexpected company arrives
44) A letter of recommendation that far exceeds your expectations
45) Having your manuscript purchased by a New York publishing house
46) That scratch off ticket that just put $100 in your pocket
47) Expecting to have lost 2 or 3 pounds and you lost 5 pounds
48) Little kids that just follow you around
49) A cute guy who gives you a big smile
50) Old people that give you the thumbs up from across the restaurant
51) Anyone who tells you that you are beautiful
52) Arriving at the party at the perfect time when just the right amount of people are there and yet you haven’t missed anything
53) When the pool is crystal clear and just warm/cool enough that you want to jump in
54) Seeing your pumpkins and tomatoes grow from flowers to full fruits and vegetables
55) The farmers market on Sunday morning
56) The right seat at church is available for you when you are at a resort location
57) Getting the concert tickets and they are front row seats
58) Meeting a magazine editor on the train to New York and developing a lasting friendship
59) Buying a new outfit that looks like it was made to fit you
60) A spa day
61) A new haircut that flatters you
62) Belgium waffles with fresh strawberries and whipped cream
63) Riding your bike and having a breeze run through your hair
64) Female friends that lift you up
65) Getting to the cash register with a sale item that you believe it a great deal and finding out it is discounted another 40%
66) An iPad 3
67) Writing a piece and dozens of people give you the thumbs up
68) Having your blogs re-tweeted to over 5,000 people
69) Receiving a good driver discount
70) Making pies and eating pies
71) A dreaded doctor visit that goes really well
72) Your husband’s love and respect
73) Your kid’s love and respect
74) Your friends and family’s love and respect
75) A new toy
76) Riding the Ferris wheel at the fair with a bag of pink cotton candy in hand and you are over 50 years old ; p
77) Long slow kisses …
78) The smell of dinner in the crockpot
79) The sounds of the ocean slapping up against the sand
80) Seeing last year’s lilies come up even prettier this year
81) Remembering a special day and reflecting upon it
82) New colored pencils and magic markers
83) A handwritten card or note that arrives in the mail
84) Getting upgraded to first class without the extra fees
85) A cold beer on a really hot day
86) Great seats for the game and your team wins
87) The smell of fresh laundry
88) Finding an old piece of jewelry and wearing it like it is brand new again
89) Shopping and NOT buying anything because you already have all that you really want
90) Your favorite artist song comes on the radio
91) Photographs that turn out better than you thought they would
92) A cup of coffee made just how you like it
93) The smell of freshly cut grass
94) Your favorite champagne as a gift to you
95) Raspberries, blueberries and peaches in season and in abundance
96) Cut watermelon
97) Time to read that book you set aside
98) A bubble bath
99) Cutting your own flower bouquet from your own garden
100) Living and loving and being happy with where you are and with whom you have become!

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

New Book! Along The Way available on Amazon and Barnes & Noble
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