Love Me

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Love Me
By Bernadette A. Moyer

child love

Love me?

Imagine if instead of seeing characteristics and traits in people that we don’t like or that we find offensive, instead we make the choice to see their inner child. The child in us all  that is looking and longing for love? That person who like all of us just wants to be loved and accepted for who and what they are? Love me.

It sounds so simple, right? Love your neighbor love your enemy, love all people just as you would want to be loved. Just as God loves us!

“When you meet anyone, remember it is a holy encounter. As you see him, you will see yourself. As you treat him, you will treat yourself. As you think of him, you will think of yourself. Never forget this, for in him you will find yourself or lose yourself.” From A Return to Love by Marianne Williamson

Often it is with the people and the relationships that challenge us the most where we have the opportunity to learn grace. Grace is where the most powerful outcomes can be realized. Our whole outlook on life can and does shift when we choose to look through the glass that is seeking and searching and declaring, “Love me.” That same glass that shadows our mirror image.

How we view ourselves is often how we view others, if we are critical of ourselves, we are then most critical of all people. When we fully love and accept ourselves, it is then that we are able to fully love and accept all others.

Rest and renew. Lord, give me wisdom to know when I must rest and be renewed. Help me to adjust my schedule when I need to be refueled. Amen. A renewed heart is a heart that is ready, willing and able to offer love in the most challenging relationships, not just the relationships that come easy for us.

“The survivor is the woman who turns lemons in to lemonade, she emerges as a triumphant shining example. She is a woman who truly knows the value of family, friendship and the gift of time, laying aside all judgment and giving unconditional love.” Suzy Toronto

What if that person who drives you crazy, that person from the President on down, instead of seeing ugly behaviors or actions we can’t tolerate, we choose to see another human being that is saying “love me” love me, warts and all, love me, as God created me just as God created you.

What a wonderful world we could all live in, if we operated understanding that we are all seeking the same things, we are all saying the same thing, simply put, love me.

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
All books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

Another Year

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Another Year
By Bernadette A. Moyer

Bernadette2017

Another year, what have I learned and what have I done with it, how have I spent my time?

In just a few days the calendar will flip over to October. Then I will have yet another birthday (God willing) and it will be my last year in my 50’s. Where does the time go?

Today I am happy and at peace with all areas of my life. I have become better at not “stepping in it.” I see it all and I hear things and many times I shake my head. Our political climate is torture for someone like me who often believes that neither extreme is all right, or all wrong, but that grace truly lives in the center.

I like the center. I like it because it is there where I can view both sides. It is there where I can gather the best insight. It is there where I may find mutual ground and a place of peace.

Right this moment in time there are people in our country who believe they know, they know who is innocent and who is guilty just by looking at them. Sad. We are living in a time, where if you “feel” “think” and “sense” that someone is guilty or innocent that is enough. Me, I still like to have the facts. It is not enough just to think it, I want to know for certain. I want to be sure and armed with facts.

I have a friend who when I first saw her in public I honestly thought she was a weirdo and that she was NOT someone that I would consider as “friend material.” Her story is that I didn’t want to be her friend because she wore red cowboy boots. My story is that it wasn’t just the red cowboy boots it was that she wore them paired with leopard print pants/tights and to pick up her elementary school aged children at a Catholic (conservative) school! The same school that my children attended.

We have been friends for more than two decades now. She still tells her “red cowboy boots” story and I tell mine. The end of the story is always the same for the both of us, “don’t judge a book by its cover.” Maybe it is even more than that … don’t judge at all and certainly don’t judge until you have all the facts. My friend is one of the most soulful, spiritual and deep-thinking people that I know. And if I would have clung onto my initial judgement we would never have been friends at all. How very sad that would have been.

The older we become the more aware we become of just how much life we have already lived and how many days are still ahead. Life has a way of presenting us with the people and the lessons that we need to learn. I am still learning. Every single day I learn, I seek out new and different things to learn.

This year was marked by a lot of work and success. My husband, my adult son (who lives at home) and myself have all been plugging away at different careers and jobs. We all work hard. But it was also marked with a significant loss in our most precious pooch Happy unexpectedly departing this life. The void and the grief months and months later still so painful. She had our hearts and was beyond joy for us. I waver between wanting to love another puppy and/or just focusing on the one that we still love and adore at home. Her death taught me once again, just how deeply I can and do love and for that alone I am most thankful. It also drives home for me just how much better I have become at letting go. Practice lots and lots of practice of loss but it hasn’t hardened my heart. Thank God!

Yes, like most people I am a work in progress. Today I love myself, warts and all, I know who I am, where I come from and most importantly what I am made up of. Life-long living that all adds up to my sum-total of me. I have lived well, I have loved deeply, and I have lost incredibly too. Together it all adds up to a rich rewarding and full life.

As with most years we have traveled to the beach to the mountains and so many places in between. Our road trips are just one of the secrets of our long, loving and lasting marriage. There is nothing like spending hours and hours in a car together to determine if you are compatible.

Through our almost 27 years together, my husband Brian and I prove that we are by all our many road trips and many miles spent together, really together. We get along, we enjoy the same things, we travel well together. It is us and us alone in this big beautiful world. We talk uninterrupted and with full attention and we look out for each other. We stop and explore we eat meals together at various restaurants. It is always a good time and opportunity to refresh our souls and our marriage.

Getting older is cause for trimming back some things and valuing more in less. My prayers are often but also less complicated too. Each day I pray to God to help me to be the very best that I can be, what more could I really ask for?

Here is to another year, another chance and another opportunity to learn and to continue to grow. Be happy, it is a choice and one worth making day after day and year after year.

Blessed and blessings … Bernadette

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
All books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

Living Learning Loving Losing

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Living Learning Loving Losing
By Bernadette A. Moyer

Flower-Fields-HD

Living, learning, loving and losing, what else is there and what else really matters?

It seems like these four words could sum up life … and/or at least be a pretty good road map for a good and rich life.

We live and do the best we can with what we know, we learn or we die, learning keeps us alive and is the breath of life. Loving, what else really makes life worth living but loving, having the ability and the capacity to both give love and to receive love? And losing where so often it is in losing that we learn our biggest lessons. The lessons that both mold us and stay with us.

Living, learning, loving and losing might also be periods of our life or seasons of life. The periods and seasons that can and may overlap too.

So I guess my questions to you my readers are what are you living for, what is defining your life right now?

And what are you learning? What is adding to your growth and development and bringing the necessary oxygen to your life?

Loving probably the greatest gift of them all, what are you loving? Who are you loving and what and who is loving you?

Losing is probably the one that we try and run from the most but the truth is losing is about living, learning and loving and making room for what is about to come next …

Each experience comes down to, what will we do with it? How will we perceive it? Will we see it for what it is or try and make more or less of it? In the end will we take and appreciate the gifts and leave the rest behind?

Happy living, learning, loving and losing, as each affords us new and different life experience, challenges and riches.

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
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Shine On!

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Shine On!
By Bernadette A. Moyer

ShineOn

Learn to love yourself!

Today and every single day it is important to have self-love, self-esteem and self-care and no it is not at all selfish. In order for us to love others, we must first learn to love ourselves. The relationship we have with ourselves is the longest relationship we will ever have here on earth.

When you are the object of someone else’s hatred and anger, remember self-love. Don’t ever allow another person to take your glow and your shine from you. Shine on!

God loves you just the way that He created you. Be yourself! Be your best self! Do it for yourself first and then for all others.

We teach others how to treat us by what we accept and what we tolerate and what we reflect. Most battles are won and lost within ourselves.

Stand tall, be proud and lead with your best self and most of all learn to love and to accept yourself. There really are no winners or losers there are happy people and unhappy people.

Happy people understand that it comes from within and that happiness is a choice.

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

Gardening Teaches Us

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Gardening Teaches Us
By Bernadette A. Moyer

vegetable garden

There are so many life lessons that are learned in the garden. Some are so simplistic and others much more complex. Like a flower that needs lots of water and sunlight and another variety that does better in shade and dry soil. Each flower, each planting has its own specific needs.

We learn how water and sun create some of the most beautiful green plants. We learn that a specific growth in a planting is a result or more and sometimes less amounts of acidic soil. The garden teaches us the importance of cutting back and weeding. Some of us talk to our plants, after all they are living things.

Each year I marvel at the plants that naturally return every season and the ones that I start new from seeds. Each plant and flower tell us their own story. Depending on the time of day and the time of year each plant has a different look.

I grew up on a small farm in Northeast Pennsylvania that was once an orchard. That farm taught me about fruited trees and growing food such as tomatoes, potatoes and more. To be a good gardener you have to be a good nurturer and in touch with different types of plants, their needs and requirements for their very survival and existence.

Roses can be tricky they require lots of water and sunlight and they are also magnets for disease and leaf eating insects. It can be a delicate balancing act and yet every year when they are cut back and survive a cold harsh winter, it can be amazing to witness them return to life in the spring.

There are so many life lessons that we learn in our gardens. Every plant is a living thing that requires different kinds of care, much like the people in our lives. People and relationships that thrive and survive under different care, nurturing and circumstance. Others like our flowers and plantings that just don’t survive and thrive at all.

Our gardens are a place where we learn many valuable life lessons just like we are afforded in all of our relationships. What works for one might not work for all. Some of my fruits and vegetables are attacked by animals and never make it to maturity. We see that happen in life too. Where a life is altered and changed by others that it encountered along the way.

I find peace, love and joy in my garden just like what I seek out in all my relationships. Like a garden that needs love, light and to be nurtured so do the relationships that we hold near and dear.

Happy gardening … happy life …

Bernadette A. Moyer on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
Books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

There Comes A Day

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There Comes A Day
By Bernadette A. Moyer

rose

There comes a day when you learn that letting go is so much healthier than hanging on. That love can be and is the best gift and best medicine for most all that ails us.

That laughter releases the negatives and soothes the soul and that you listen and see and hear and yet never feel the desire to speak. And then comes the day when just like your garden, that changes daily, weekly and with each season, so too have you changed.

Then comes a day when you accept and embrace the flaws within yourself and in others and you come to that place of peace where there is nothing that you are willing to engage in, if it isn’t love or coming from a truth based place of love.

Then there comes a day when you find all the joy, love and peace within your own heart and soul. Rather than seeking out others to fill your own voids.

There comes a day when you are content with little and lots just looks like more to manage. There comes a day when you realize that enough, truly is enough.

There comes a day when you are in alignment with your own heart and centered enough to know who and what you are all about, that nothing other people do or say is about you. It never was or will be about you, but rather all about them.

There comes a day when you are free and understand what freedom means,  what it really is and brings with it and places upon us.

There comes a day … when we finally trust enough to let go and let God lead us and we know that there was never a need for control or fear or anxiety.

There comes a day …

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
All books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

Left Behind

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Left Behind
By Bernadette A. Moyer

lavendar

No one wants to be that person, the one who gets left behind. Sooner or later we all have that experience and it never feels good. Whether we are left by choice, by divorce or by death, being left behind is hard and it is a scary feeling.

We build our lives with others, we have friends, we have families and we have our pets. When they leave and we are left behind we feel that void. That special place they once held now is an open space.

Our bichon Chipper is grieving his sister Happy who passed over just a few weeks ago. We have never heard such deep intense cries from him in all our seven years with him.

Every time when of our children grew up and left home, we almost immediately replaced them with a furry baby. Each dog has held our heart much like our young children once did, today we grieve Happy. It drives home again, that feeling of being left.

Yet with Happy is was a soft pain and loss because we have so many happy memories with her. She was just so easy to care for and to love. It was natural.

“Those we love never truly leave us, Harry. There are things that death cannot touch.” – Jack Thorne, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

From day one my husband Brian and I acknowledged that one of us would be “widowed” again, one of us would know that feeling again … that feeling of being left behind. We do everything in our power to honor all the time that we share together by living our best life and living it as centered and honest as possible.

So many people live within us… we remember … we grieve… we rejoice …we are better for having known them and loved them …

Each of us finds that day when we move past the loss … past the grief … and truly celebrate what once was and what was once shared. We learn once again that life is for the living and that we must live it!

“If you focus on what you left behind, you will never see what lies ahead.” – Gusteau, Ratatouille

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
All books by Bernadette on Amazon and Barnes & Noble