good and evil

The Good People

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The Good People
By Bernadette A. Moyer

good people

In a world that seems to be spiraling downward with greater speed and in larger numbers it is easy to become cynical and skewed as a result. Focus on the good people. They are still out there. If you aren’t already good become your best. Be better today than you were yesterday and strive to be even better tomorrow.

I have always had people that I looked up to, people that survived and even thrived in the most difficult situations. Shortly after moving to Baltimore, when my first husband died, I became aware of local TV News Anchor Susan White-Bowden. Her husband had committed suicide and later her teen son also took his own life. She had to be devastated although on television you would never have known it. She carried on and she did it with class and grace.

She was a hero for me. Many years later I would invite her to book events that I held and even a slumber party for women. Susan was and is awe inspiring speaker and author. I watched her take the audience from laughter to tears and back. She sold out of her books. People love her. She took the unimaginable and turned it around for the greater good. Nothing was going to bring her 17 year old son back but she showed us all that even with that intense loss and grief, life was worth living. And it was worth living well.

Last night I watched the first part of the Elizabeth Smart story in her words. Elizabeth is another woman that amazes me. She literally went from hell and came back to life. She was kidnapped, repeatedly raped and tied up and chained. She was treated worse than any wild animal. She survived it all. Came back to life wrote a book, shared her story and now speaks out and inspires others.

When I think of these women I am inspired and awe struck. Then I wonder what went into their recovery. Was it therapy? Was it support from loved ones? Is it the way they are wired and build? Are they just naturally strong? Or is it a combination of many of these things? I would be willing it is a combination of many of these things with the main thing being the desire and determination to heal. I believe that they wanted to be better and worked hard to get better. And so they did.

In our news today we are riddled with creepy people and creepy stories, things people have done to one another. The people who abuse physically, sexually and verbally and people that have no value for life and kill. One thing I know for sure is that we must focus and give the oxygen to the survivors and the ones who thrive. We must learn to focus on the good people.

There will always be haters and hurters but we don’t need to give up any more oxygen for them. Life has its own way of dealing with those people. Generally as a society my sense is that we give too much life and breath to people that are sick, evil and just not good people.

Who can you call out today for doing good and being a good person? Who can you help raise up that wants to be better and do good? What can you do today for yourself to be better than you were yesterday?

People that have been to hell and back always inspire me, I look at them and I think they thrived and survived through all that and so can I and so can everyone. You just have to want it, and want it badly enough to work through it.

Prayers up! Today I celebrate all the good people in this world and in my own life and I Thank God and feel so blessed to know more than just a few of them …

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

Along The Way and Another Way on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

Keeping Positive During These Negative Times

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Keeping Positive During These Negative Times
By Bernadette A. Moyer

positive

Have you had enough yet? I have! I have stopped watching the news, all of it! I am tired of all the negativity from both sides.

Wow! The amount of disrespect for this President makes me sick inside. Whether you like him or not, we are one Country and he was elected. If this isn’t your choice then go do something productive and positive to change the course.

When I see people hold signage of hatred and signs that read “Resist” and “Not My President” all I can think of is how other countries must view us and then I think about all the childhood lessons we were taught about winning and losing. That being a “sore loser” just wasn’t an option. And more than that I think about little kids with eyes wide open that are seeing a culture of disrespect, disrespect from all sides on all issues and towards all kinds of people.

What am I going to do about it? I don’t even switch channels as not to give the hate media more exposure and more clicks. When friends and associates post things I can’t stomach I quickly scan by and sometimes even remove them and block them. You see to me the sounds and the signs of disrespect, hate, anger, ugly words used by people that I know looks badly on them and not at all on their intended targets. Sadly it makes me think less of them.

People that spew anger, hatred, ugly comments and sentiments only make themselves look bad, period. I don’t want any parts of it.

My husband comes home from work and says, “Did you hear about this or did you see that —?” and I am like no I haven’t I have decided to tune it all out.

So what am I feeding my heart and my soul these days?

• More music
• Longer walks in nature
• Candles
• Pretty pictures
• Bird watching
• Cooking
• Baking
• Cleaning
• Writing
• Hanging out with my fur babies
• Reading
• Journaling
• Prayers
• Home improvement projects
• Adult coloring books

I can’t control what anyone else says and does but I can control how I respond to it. I choose to deliberately put my peace and well-being above all the political noise. And that is exactly what it is nothing but noise!

How many wonderful things could you be doing with your time and with your life rather than spewing ugly words and derogatory statements when the truth is you don’t even have all the insider knowledge and facts? The information that you are currently receiving is coming to you by a bias media that has their own agenda. They don’t think we are smart enough to hear all the facts and then make our own decisions without them telling us how to think. No thanks!

Didn’t we all grow up with our parents teaching us that “if you can’t say anything nice, then don’t say anything at all!” Mine did good advice then and still good advice today.

If nothing else adults should stop and think if their behaviors are ones that little kids should ever witness? If the answer is “no” that might be a pretty good indication that no good comes from what you are doing and from any form of hate and anger.

Find a positive outlet for your upset, anger and disappointments and try to do something good and worthwhile. Please!

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

All books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

Netflix “The Keepers” – My Thoughts

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Netflix “The Keepers” – My Thoughts
By Bernadette A. Moyer

The-Keepers-668x989

It has been a few days since I watched all 7-episodes of “The Keepers” a Netflix true crime docuseries. Since watching it I have felt a wide range of emotions and have many thoughts. I would like to share a few.

I was born and raised Catholic and I graduated from a co-ed Catholic High School in Northeast Pennsylvania. I am very proud of my Christian roots and my many Catholic friends.

My oldest daughter graduated from a very prestigious all girls Catholic High School in northern Baltimore County, Maryland.

For seven years I worked for the Archdiocese of Baltimore at a youth retreat house. For more than 35 years I have lived in Baltimore County Maryland.

“The Keepers” story takes place in Baltimore County and the abuse alleged occurred in Baltimore County and by a Catholic Priest who was part of the Archdiocese of Baltimore.

Although I was never sexually abused, sexual abuse impacted my family in a big way when a child molester married into our family and abused a little girl that I knew well. Most of the family loved and supported the child molester and did not believe the child who made the accusations.

I have written a few blogs about sexual abuse because I witnessed first- hand all the fall out when child sexual abuse becomes known within a family and in the community.

The first thought I have about this Netflix series is that the victims are true survivors and should be applauded for their strength and courage. No one should ever have to endure the abuse that they suffered. I appreciate their story and the depth of courage that it took for them to tell it.

I also felt incredible disgust at the Priest Fr. Joseph Maskell who abused so many children both boys and girls. He was a sick disgusting person who also happened to be a Catholic Priest. He was trusted and operated from a position of power that he repeatedly abused. This man should have never been trusted and he should never have been allowed access to young girls and boys.

The story starts out because a young beloved nun Sister Catherine Cesnik is missing and later found murdered. The sexual abuse came out later as a possible motive to the murder. It is believed that she may have been ready to report the Priest for abuse when she was murdered. To this date it is still an unsolved murder.

One of the points made in the series is that The Catholic Church is a business and it is, when we are young and so naïve and trusting we might not think like that.

I struggle with finding the right words as I write this. Sexual abuse doesn’t happen in a vacuum and it isn’t a random act. The abusers groom their victims and are often very charming and likeable. Sexual abusers are not strangers they are people that we know and people that we trust to have around our children. We do not allow our children to be in the company of strangers.

People don’t like talking about sexual abuse and they don’t want to admit that anyone they know and love is capable of molesting and even raping a child. For most people in order to believe the accuser they have to also believe the person they hold in high esteem like this Catholic Priest Fr. Joseph Maskell is capable of the acts of sexual abuse and rape of a child. People just don’t want to be wrong.

In light of all the many recent findings of sexual abuse within the Catholic community and the Priesthood it is not difficult to understand why many populations of people do not have a high opinion of the Catholic Church. If you weren’t Catholic and if this is all you knew about the Catholic community you would not and could not have a good opinion of them.

There is good and there is evil in every community. As much as my heart is with the victims and it truly is I can’t help but wonder about Fr. Joseph Maskell. What on earth happened to this man to make him so sick and so evil? I have a hard time believing that anyone could be born so hateful, so cruel and so heartless.

I also question whether we give too much power away do we hold other people and institutions up when the only person we should hold up is ourselves and our own faith in God. Fr. Maskell got away with abuse and it is believed that he did so with the support of the police and the Catholic Church.

Many of the key players from the Catholic Church and Archdiocese of Baltimore who were identified at the end of this docuseries I personally sat in meetings with and attended numerous functions with, I knew them fairly well. If I had to call out one common trait it would be ignorance and arrogance. They just can’t be wrong. In my view their denial contributed and caused extended pain to the survivors.

It would have cost them to believe the abused children. It would have cost them the reputation of the Catholic Church and it would cost them much money in lawsuits. The Catholic Church had both, it had a good and prestigious reputation and it has wealth. It also has armies of people, professionals including lawyers and law enforcement that defend them.

The victims on the other hand needed to be believed and supported and they were not. The cost to believe them was huge. In many ways the victims were victimized a second time when the system failed to believe and support them and then take the appropriate actions. Sexual abuse is a crime.

I pray that this murder is solved. I pray that the Catholic Church makes amends and does what is right. As a result of this series the Baltimore Police have added a link to their website where victims can come forward and also for anyone with information about the murder of Sister Cathy to come forward.

Hopefully this series brings about much healing and resolution.

It is never too late to make amends.

It is never too late to do what is right.

For so many reasons I believe that “The Keepers” should be viewed by everyone, if for no other reason than awareness and awareness on a subject that most people want to turn away from unless or until they are directly confronted.

I want to end this blog by stating again, there is good and evil in every community. There are many good and wonderful people that work every single day in the Catholic Community and they are doing really good works. Many of them I consider to be good friends.

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

All books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble