What We Leave Behind
By Bernadette A Moyer
There is nothing that I have ever had and lost or grieved over that I would welcome back in my life. Isn’t that funny? We cry so hard. We want another outcome. But once we have the time to process it becomes so clear that what we thought we wanted and what we thought we needed was never intended to stay in our lives. It could be a relationship it could be a job, it could be almost anything that was once so valued and later becomes just what we leave behind.
Many years ago I was involved with a guy and I will never forget his own father saying to me, “What is a girl like you who is so on the ball doing with a guy like him?” At the time I couldn’t see it but it turns out that he was right. That guy was never really intended for me.
Recently I was talking with a really good friend. He shared with me the first relationship that ever broke his heart. He talks about how much he wanted it to work out. Not that long ago he looked her up she had more than 50 court cases where she was the defendant. She is a drug addict and eventually pled guilty to prostitution. Now all he can think is thank God that didn’t work out. Or maybe it did work out exactly as it was meant to be, she was never intended to be a lifelong friend and partner. Her time in his story was short and it was over. It was what he left behind.
Today I look back on so many things that changed and things that I once grieved over and not one of them would I want back in my life. The following is one of my favorite quotes;
“There are people who can walk away from you … let them walk. I don’t want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. Your destiny is never tied to anyone that left. And it doesn’t mean that they are a bad person, it just means that their part in your story is over. And you have to know when people’s part in your story is over.” T.D. Jakes
It is so freeing to just accept that we will leave people, we will leave places and we will leave positions behind. Nothing is meant to last forever. We learn from all that we leave behind. If something or someone was meant to be in our lives, they would be in our lives, period.
There is so much to love and so much to do and experience in our lifetime. When one door closes, truly another one opens.
“None of us are getting out of here alive, so please stop treating yourself like an afterthought. Eat the delicious food. Walk in the sunshine. Jump in the ocean. Say the truth that you’re carrying in your heart like hidden treasure. Be silly. Be kind. Be weird. There’s no time for anything else.” Richard Gere
Here is to living the good life and to appreciating all that we have all that is yet to be and knowing that it is perfectly okay to leave somethings and some people behind …
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wisdom
Yes wisdom that comes from life experiences! Thanks!
I can absolutely agree with this – when it comes to most relationships. But when it is your child who has walked away and taken your grandchildren with him – then I can’t say the same. I would welcome them back with open arms any time at all.
I can see why you would feel that way! I did for a really long time too. Sometimes even our children go too far and it is healthier to let go. All the best!
I agree, even though sometimes this can be true for your children as they have made the conscious decision to move on without you, perhpas it is best to let them go . . . but the realationship with the grandchildren is the difficult one. They are young and have not made that choice for themselves.
I could have been a grandmother twice but daughter decided it wasn’t to be. You can’t miss what you never had although I do know how much my husband and I had to give. The grandkids are inoccent victims. Sorry for your loss! You are not alone! XOXO Bernadette
💘 this!!!
Very well said 😃😃
Thank you! ❤️