Gardening Teaches Us

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Gardening Teaches Us
By Bernadette A. Moyer

vegetable garden

There are so many life lessons that are learned in the garden. Some are so simplistic and others much more complex. Like a flower that needs lots of water and sunlight and another variety that does better in shade and dry soil. Each flower, each planting has its own specific needs.

We learn how water and sun create some of the most beautiful green plants. We learn that a specific growth in a planting is a result or more and sometimes less amounts of acidic soil. The garden teaches us the importance of cutting back and weeding. Some of us talk to our plants, after all they are living things.

Each year I marvel at the plants that naturally return every season and the ones that I start new from seeds. Each plant and flower tell us their own story. Depending on the time of day and the time of year each plant has a different look.

I grew up on a small farm in Northeast Pennsylvania that was once an orchard. That farm taught me about fruited trees and growing food such as tomatoes, potatoes and more. To be a good gardener you have to be a good nurturer and in touch with different types of plants, their needs and requirements for their very survival and existence.

Roses can be tricky they require lots of water and sunlight and they are also magnets for disease and leaf eating insects. It can be a delicate balancing act and yet every year when they are cut back and survive a cold harsh winter, it can be amazing to witness them return to life in the spring.

There are so many life lessons that we learn in our gardens. Every plant is a living thing that requires different kinds of care, much like the people in our lives. People and relationships that thrive and survive under different care, nurturing and circumstance. Others like our flowers and plantings that just don’t survive and thrive at all.

Our gardens are a place where we learn many valuable life lessons just like we are afforded in all of our relationships. What works for one might not work for all. Some of my fruits and vegetables are attacked by animals and never make it to maturity. We see that happen in life too. Where a life is altered and changed by others that it encountered along the way.

I find peace, love and joy in my garden just like what I seek out in all my relationships. Like a garden that needs love, light and to be nurtured so do the relationships that we hold near and dear.

Happy gardening … happy life …

Bernadette A. Moyer on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
Books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

Left Behind

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Left Behind
By Bernadette A. Moyer

lavendar

No one wants to be that person, the one who gets left behind. Sooner or later we all have that experience and it never feels good. Whether we are left by choice, by divorce or by death, being left behind is hard and it is a scary feeling.

We build our lives with others, we have friends, we have families and we have our pets. When they leave and we are left behind we feel that void. That special place they once held now is an open space.

Our bichon Chipper is grieving his sister Happy who passed over just a few weeks ago. We have never heard such deep intense cries from him in all our seven years with him.

Every time when of our children grew up and left home, we almost immediately replaced them with a furry baby. Each dog has held our heart much like our young children once did, today we grieve Happy. It drives home again, that feeling of being left.

Yet with Happy is was a soft pain and loss because we have so many happy memories with her. She was just so easy to care for and to love. It was natural.

“Those we love never truly leave us, Harry. There are things that death cannot touch.” – Jack Thorne, Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

From day one my husband Brian and I acknowledged that one of us would be “widowed” again, one of us would know that feeling again … that feeling of being left behind. We do everything in our power to honor all the time that we share together by living our best life and living it as centered and honest as possible.

So many people live within us… we remember … we grieve… we rejoice …we are better for having known them and loved them …

Each of us finds that day when we move past the loss … past the grief … and truly celebrate what once was and what was once shared. We learn once again that life is for the living and that we must live it!

“If you focus on what you left behind, you will never see what lies ahead.” – Gusteau, Ratatouille

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
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The Lives We Touch

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The Lives We Touch
By Bernadette A. Moyer

lives

My Uncle Lou recently passed on, he was a doctor. He was a huge personality and he loved what he did and was good at it. There is no way to tell just how many lives he touched, how many people he made a difference to and just how many people will remember him now that he is gone.

His obituary states that he was a medical doctor for 61 years. What I remember is a man that truly was larger than life. He was a tremendous support to my mother, his sister. He was always giving; he always had something to offer and to give.

As a little girl I remember the many times he came to visit my grandmother, his mother and times we visited him and his family. These memories are from long ago, yet it is impossible not to think of them with his recent passing.

The only way we do justice to life is by living it to its fullest. He was 88 years old. If I live that long, I will have 30 more years ahead of me, there is nothing like a death to drive home for us just how numbered our days here are, there will be an ending one day.

But how many lives will we touch? Who will remember us upon our passing?

Many years ago a significant death in my life taught me “life is for the living, live it.” And today I would add, “Touch as many lives as you can, and be touched by as many lives too, because that is all that truly matters the most in life!”

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadtteamoyer

Books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

What Do I Want

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What Do I Want
By Bernadette A. Moyer

whatwant

What do I want? What do I want out of life? What do I want out of today and tomorrow and next week and next year?

Seems like many times in life we should rethink and ask that question as it is sure to change as we continue to grow and change.

I truly believe the happiest people are the ones that are living their lives in a way that answers that question. What do I want? What makes me happy? How do I want to live my life and take care of myself? What do I need to be happy?

When we are young we are consumed with “what do I want” and answering and doing what we want then comes life and responsibilities, that career job, owning a home or a car and having children or pets all depend on us to produce and to provide. Sometimes it is easy to get lost in what does everyone need rather than in what do I want.

Having children and raising them is one of the most selfless acts and responsibility that we will ever take on, being responsible for another human being is the highest calling and requires giving and giving and giving on a minute to minute hour to hour and daily basis. It is never ending, but it also requires us to put our own personal wants and needs on a back burner. Kids have immediate needs all they know is now and later, adults can and do wait.

Then it happens the kids are raised, and full fledged adults out on their own and once again it is the perfect time for us, just us.

What do I want? It sounds so easy, right? But is it? How do you go about answering that question?

“Be careful what you wish for, you may receive it.”  W.W. Jacobs

For me its starts with a gut check, how am I feeling? Then it goes to making lists, what else do I want to do and accomplish in this lifetime? Then jumping off and staring, diving in, trying, learning, giving it a whirl.

No other person can answer that question for us and sometimes it takes thought, aloneness and quiet for us to come up with it ourselves. All I know for sure is that the only road to true and lasting happiness is finding a way to afford what you want in both time and treasure and then setting out and making it happen!

Here is to your happiness and here is to getting and appreciating all that you ever needed and wanted …

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

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Another Year

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Another Year
By Bernadette A. Moyer

beachbench

My husband just celebrated his birthday a few days ago and in less than a month I will celebrate mine, God willing. And I truly mean “God willing” since not one of us knows when that actual date of ending life will arrive we just know that it is a foregone conclusion.

There are so many gifts that come with age; the first being wisdom. Wisdom that comes from years of living life and wisdom that comes from learning life lessons.

With each year we become more grateful not just grateful for what we have now but grateful for all that we endured and survived. My parents’ generation was famous for sayings like “youth is wasted on the young.” When you get older you can appreciate a statement like that one more and more.

We celebrated his birthday with a weekend chock full of events and activities and his children remembered him and that was all he needed, he was happy and indeed celebrated a happy birthday.

Another year becomes another chance to do and to see and to learn and to grow. Another year translates to endless possibilities and the magic that is yet to unfold.

Above all else we are just so thankful and so grateful and so truly appreciative, we are here, we are together and we share so much love …

Thank you God for this year and for the chance and the hopes that a new year can and will bring our way.

It just sounds so simple and yet so magnificent … another year … God willing!

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
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57 Things I Learned in My 57 Years

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57 Things I Learned in My 57 Years
By Bernadette A. Moyer

mepic

1) My life and my happiness is my responsibility, period.

2) Kids will come and kids will go, build a life that is meaningful long after their departure.

3) Don’t take it personally, nothing other people do is because of you, it is because of them.

4) Gather as much information as you can and then make informed decisions.

5) Pick the guy who believes in you, supports you, loves you and thinks you are beautiful.

6) Bad boys are just that, bad.

7) Trust few but always trust in your own inner voice.

8) Every single day is a blessing.

9) Nothing lasts forever, this too shall pass.

10) People will come into your life and people will leave your life, let them.

11) You are beautiful just the way you are, believe it! No one knows your heart like you do.

12) Work hard, go that extra mile but play hard too.

13) Nature offers peace every single day and in every single season.

14) Animals have incredible souls and are capable of the most love and loyalty.

15) Writers write.

16) Estrangement is strange. It isn’t normal and there are no winners.

17) Trust someone the first time they reveal themselves to you.

18) Marriage requires ongoing efforts and commitment grounded in genuine love and care.

19) Surround yourself with people, places and things that you love. Create your own beautiful life.

20) I was a shy kid that stuttered; today I could debate with the best. Where you start is just a start.

21) Never ever give up on yourself.

22) Campy as it sounds, “Into each life, some rain must fall.”

23) Learn from it and then get over it!

24) Beauty exists everywhere and so does ugliness.

25) Good people can and do make bad mistakes.

26) You are not defined by one person, one experience or single life event.

27) Everything that seems bad really can be turned around and into something good.

28) Be a life-long learner. There is always something new to learn.

29) Gratitude is an attitude.

30) Life goes on …

31) God is good. In an ever changing world God is my salvation.

32) Family is so much more than blood; it is the people that love, support and see the best in you.

33) Girlfriend time is always time well spent.

34) Stress less. Pray more and worry less.

35) Eat the good foods and exercise. Life is about balance.

36) Make love, lots and lots of love.

37) Negative people are just that, negative.

38) Take the time to get to know yourself and always be your own best friend.

39) There is a big difference between being alone and being lonely.

40) Peace is always possible.

41) Stability doesn’t have to be boring.

42) Make something build something bake something create more. Just do it.

43) Build on a solid foundation.

44) Embrace change. Don’t fight it be open to new things, new people and new experiences.

45) Painful lessons are lasting lessons.

46) Pretty comes and pretty goes but being nice will last forever.

47) Share as much as possible but don’t allow yourself to be taken for granted.

48) Hatred and anger doesn’t look good on anyone. Not ever.

49) Forgive but don’t forget.

50) Not everything ends with “happy ever after” but that doesn’t mean your happiness has to end.

51) Give back! Every single person has something to offer.

52) Never wrestle with a pig, because you will both get dirty and the pig likes it.

53) We all have a birth date and a death date, no one gets out alive. Enjoy everything in between.

54) Getting old is a gift, cherish it.

55) Wisdom is born with age.

56) Breathe. Take long deep breathes.

57) Most things can be cured with a long hot bubble bath, a cup of tea or a glass of wine and a big warm embracing hug!

BONUS!

#58 Just because someone said it, doesn’t make it true.

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

All books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

Simple Pleasures

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Simple Pleasures
By Bernadette A. Moyer

peaches

Simple pleasures, what are yours?

Just a few of mine include:

• That bowl of fresh peaches sitting on the kitchen counter
• My first cup of coffee in the morning
• Snuggling with my two pooches
• Watching my husband drive up after a long work day
• The look and smells of a freshly cut lawn
• Driving top down on a quiet country road with the music blaring
• Sunsets
• Sunrise
• The innocence of small children
• A clean house
• A clean desk
• Quiet time at home
• Lunch with a friend
• Writing a new blog
• The subtle seasonal changes
• Sitting on the beach
• Praying to God
• Good friends
• Happy people
• My roses opening and in full bloom
• A new book or magazine waiting to be read
• Rabbits running through the yard
• A road trip
• A live concert
• A baseball game
• Long meaningful conversations
• Fresh new paper and stationary
• Birthdays
• Holidays
• Cooking dinner
• Baking treats
• The smell of fresh laundry
• Long lazy weekends
• A tall glass of ice water

And I seriously could go on and on …

What are your simple pleasures? Gratitude is an attitude!

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

All books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble