enjoyment – Bernadette A. Sahm

Enjoying Life!
By Bernadette A. Moyer

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“So what have you been up to?” This question was from someone that I ran into at the grocery store, someone I have not seen in about ten years. And even before I could think about it I responded with “enjoying my life!” Then I almost started to feel guilty and started rattling off a series of ongoing projects that keep me busy but I quickly doubled back to actually “I am enjoying my life more and more these days!”

Earlier in the day, I had just run some errands with my son who is always so appreciative of all that we do for him and with him. I am starting a new series of blogs and spent time with the dogs, downloaded a new recipe I plan to try and accepted a friend’s request to help proofread her latest book project. Next week when I have jury duty I will busy myself with her new book. So what have I been up to? Lots of stuff, lots of fun and rewarding stuff like the little things in life but doing them with much more enjoyment.

My husband and I are at the age where we appreciate everything more and we are genuinely happy. We talk about our aging and even when our lives end. He says, “I want my face to be the last thing you see when you die.” I know he doesn’t want me to ever die and leave him but we know that isn’t how life works. What he is telling me yet again is that I can count on him; he will be there for me until my time comes unless of course he goes first. We are blessed and we know it. Our marriage has survived so much and all the struggles and all the trials and tribulations made us stronger and more appreciative of each other and more in love.

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It is all about how we look at things, we can complain about having to scrub the kitchen floor or we can be thankful we have a kitchen floor to scrub. It is all about how we choose to see things. It is also about what we surround ourselves with and who we engage.

There are a lot of things we just don’t care about anymore, mainly what other people do and say. We know who we are and we know what we are made of, what other people think and say isn’t a concern of ours. There is something so freeing about not giving your power away and not allowing others to judge. Happiness comes from within and when we are doing what makes us happy it is so easy to enjoy life.

We can complain about aging and our aching back or this ailment or that one or we can remember that life is limited and so we must decide how we want to spend it. “Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.” Unknown Author

It doesn’t take much to make us happy we are easily amused and laugh more and more each day. Again it’s a choice. So what have I been up to? I have been up to the best possible things on earth and the most simplistic ones too. Enjoying my life more and more each and every single day because only God knows how many days we will have here in this lifetime to enjoy. Have fun! Do what makes you happy and surround yourself with people that you love and that love you too!

If this is what you get in older age, we will take it …

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer
Books by Bernadette A. Moyer on Amazon and Barnes & Noble

A Time for Reinvesting in Ourselves
By Bernadette A. Moyer

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It is becoming clear to me that our 50’s are a time of reinvesting in ourselves. For years we were living in the “sandwich” years between supporting ailing parents and raising our children. With two high demand careers, very little in the past ten years was about investing in ourselves. We spent our time and our energy on parents and on our children and we were happy to do it.

Between my husband and myself there is just one remaining parent and he is being well taken care of in an assisted living center. For so many years my husband was running him to the doctors, to the pharmacy and the food store. He literally was his father’s lifeline to the outside world until severe dementia made it impossible for us to continue to support him. He needed 24-hour care. It was a hard decision but a necessary one. (Update John passed in December of 2014) Today all our parents have passed away.

Our three kids have all been raised and no longer need us to support them. It took some getting used to when you have supported children physically, emotionally and financially for decades. But like everything in life there is a beginning, middle and an ending. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.

We are still young and investment worthy as both my husband and I are gearing up for what is ahead for us. At this moment in time we have both turned to education and wellness as to where we are putting our energy and support. Brian is studying and securing a Maryland State license that will allow him to further his career. I am taking an updated business class and learning more and more about marketing and social media and blogging.

In 2015 two new books were published and my blogs continue to attract thousands of readers, many who write to me and some who connect in person.

For our health many of the procedures we have put off are being addressed. At this time we are eating healthier and more organic fresh foods. We see the value in laughing more and pacing ourselves as we get through our work weeks and our off time. There is a new balance in our lives of both production and fun. We no longer have to put ailing parents and our children ahead of our own needs. No one told us that this would be the “all about us years.” My husband loves having me all to himself.

Years ago I read that men never really “get their nicest or come into their own until their 50’s” for us this seems to ring true. Going out with my husband is like going on a really great date. This past year we travelled and attended so many functions and events, when he treated us to an Orioles baseball game we had the best time. He secured really great seats on the first base line looking directly into the dugout. We sat just a few feet from all the professional ballplayers. Brian held my hand as we walked through the city streets. And he walked to bring me bottled water and was really tuned into whatever I needed or wanted to enjoy the experience.

There is something so sweet and so nice about being appreciated by a man you have loved and lived with for 24 years. He expresses his gratitude for all the many sacrifices I made, and those that I wanted to make in helping him to raise his twin children. We survived and even thrived in spite of many challenges throughout all these years together.

What we have right now is yet another opportunity to reinvest in ourselves and in our marriage. It is a great feeling to be afforded this opportunity and at this time in our lives. This is a period of time that we never talked about or one that I never even thought about but now that we are here, I am thrilled. I hope that all our friends and family members also get this same special time in their life. All I can say is isn’t being in our 50’s great? We are worth it. We have worked hard and now it really is all about us. And who knows what our 60’s will bring but for now it is all about enjoying life, enjoying the simple pleasure of everyday life.

These are the reinvestment years and what greater cause for making an investment than in our own health and happiness!

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

New books Along The Way and Another Way are available at Amazon and Barnes and Noble