A Time for Reinvesting in Ourselves

A Time for Reinvesting in Ourselves
By Bernadette A. Moyer

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It is becoming clear to me that our 50’s are a time of reinvesting in ourselves. For years we were living in the “sandwich” years between supporting ailing parents and raising our children. With two high demand careers, very little in the past ten years was about investing in ourselves. We spent our time and our energy on parents and on our children and we were happy to do it.

Between my husband and myself there is just one remaining parent and he is being well taken care of in an assisted living center. For so many years my husband was running him to the doctors, to the pharmacy and the food store. He literally was his father’s lifeline to the outside world until severe dementia made it impossible for us to continue to support him. He needed 24-hour care. It was a hard decision but a necessary one. (Update John passed in December of 2014) Today all our parents have passed away.

Our three kids have all been raised and no longer need us to support them. It took some getting used to when you have supported children physically, emotionally and financially for decades. But like everything in life there is a beginning, middle and an ending. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.

We are still young and investment worthy as both my husband and I are gearing up for what is ahead for us. At this moment in time we have both turned to education and wellness as to where we are putting our energy and support. Brian is studying and securing a Maryland State license that will allow him to further his career. I am taking an updated business class and learning more and more about marketing and social media and blogging.

In 2015 two new books were published and my blogs continue to attract thousands of readers, many who write to me and some who connect in person.

For our health many of the procedures we have put off are being addressed. At this time we are eating healthier and more organic fresh foods. We see the value in laughing more and pacing ourselves as we get through our work weeks and our off time. There is a new balance in our lives of both production and fun. We no longer have to put ailing parents and our children ahead of our own needs. No one told us that this would be the “all about us years.” My husband loves having me all to himself.

Years ago I read that men never really “get their nicest or come into their own until their 50’s” for us this seems to ring true. Going out with my husband is like going on a really great date. This past year we travelled and attended so many functions and events, when he treated us to an Orioles baseball game we had the best time. He secured really great seats on the first base line looking directly into the dugout. We sat just a few feet from all the professional ballplayers. Brian held my hand as we walked through the city streets. And he walked to bring me bottled water and was really tuned into whatever I needed or wanted to enjoy the experience.

There is something so sweet and so nice about being appreciated by a man you have loved and lived with for 24 years. He expresses his gratitude for all the many sacrifices I made, and those that I wanted to make in helping him to raise his twin children. We survived and even thrived in spite of many challenges throughout all these years together.

What we have right now is yet another opportunity to reinvest in ourselves and in our marriage. It is a great feeling to be afforded this opportunity and at this time in our lives. This is a period of time that we never talked about or one that I never even thought about but now that we are here, I am thrilled. I hope that all our friends and family members also get this same special time in their life. All I can say is isn’t being in our 50’s great? We are worth it. We have worked hard and now it really is all about us. And who knows what our 60’s will bring but for now it is all about enjoying life, enjoying the simple pleasure of everyday life.

These are the reinvestment years and what greater cause for making an investment than in our own health and happiness!

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

New books Along The Way and Another Way are available at Amazon and Barnes and Noble

What I Learned About Socialism

What I Learned About Socialism
By Bernadette A. Moyer

I learned about socialism when I was in the third grade and I learned it from twin boys that were my own age. Van and Yar along with their parents had fled from Yugoslavia to the United States of America. The word “fled” was their word and not mine. According to them, they came here for a better life and more opportunities.

The twins not only went to my school but they lived in my neighborhood, I am sure this was why I was asked to tutor them in English. They didn’t know our language but they were eager to learn it and I was happy to teach them.

They explained to me that if you had a loaf of bread and your neighbor had none, you were expected to give half that loaf to the neighbor. Their culture in Yugoslavia didn’t allow them free choice. Kids were tested and told what school and ultimately what career would be assigned to them. The government chose for the people. The people did not have the many freedoms that we are afforded here in the United States of America.

It didn’t take long for Van and Yar to integrate into our culture. It has been many decades now but the last time I saw them we were in high school and they were both popular and excelling in school. Their futures were bright and according to them a lot better than anything they would have had back home in Yugoslavia.

This family was willing to leave everything in Yugoslavia behind them and that meant socialism. They knew they could do better here in our country.
As we are into the process to elect our next President of the United States, I can’t help but be struck by the popularity of Senator Bernie Sanders, a self-proclaimed Democratic Socialist. He makes no bones about wanted the rich to pick up the slack of the poor. He makes no bones about a desire to re-distribute wealth.

What also strikes me is how popular he appears to be with so many college aged students. They hear the word “free” like in “free college” for everyone and they are beating the drums for him. “Feeling the Bern” is the new high for a generation of young people that have yet to work for anything. They don’t yet know what it is like to get a job, work hard, set goals, buy a car, purchase a home and raise children. Most students are still living on mommy and daddy’s dime. I can’t help but wonder how they will feel when it is their paycheck that is reduced by 50, 60, 70% or more in taxes to pay for all that “free” college and “free” healthcare.

Seems to me that in order to understand socialism you would want to research the countries that adhere to this way of life and ask yourself are they living a better quality of life? Ask the people that literally “fled” from both socialism and communism and listen to what they know about living this way.

Most educated people know that nothing is “free” somewhere someone along the way is paying. Should the cost of education and the cost of healthcare be so high? Probably not. But expecting a government or expecting other people to pay for our education and/or our healthcare isn’t what our country was ever built upon.

Our country is a melting pot and a country of immigrants. People that came here not because we gave “free” anything but rather because they wanted the American way. They wanted to come to the United States because they knew that if they worked hard that their dreams would be realized.

What bothers me most about today’s young person and their expectations of “free” isn’t as much as their desire for everything to be given to them but their lack of any desire or willingness to work hard.

I don’t know of anyone who is successful and who has a good life where you can’t trace it back to a desire to work towards goals and toward achieving them. It scares me to think that a burning desire for success could be replaced with the apathy that comes from sitting back and expecting everything to just be handed to you.

What I learned about socialism I learned way back in the third grade when a family “fled” their native Yugoslavia to come to the “land of opportunity” also known as The United States of America.

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

New books Along The Way and Another Way available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble

Sit and Smile

Sit and Smile
By Bernadette A. Moyer

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Prayer and meditation doesn’t have to be so complicated, just sit and smile!

Sit and smile through your eyes, your ears, your nose, your heart, your throat and all your being. Smile, smile again and again and sit with that smile.

We get so caught up in the ugly stuff, the deaths and the destruction in life then we look outward to our friends, our families and our churches and therapists for all our own answers. I myself have been caught up in that.

Looking to a clergy person, a friend or a family member to help “fix” me, then when I look really closely at them, I think, they can hardly help themselves, how on earth are they going to “fix” me. And why would they even be motivated to do so even if they could?

Every search I’ve been on has ultimately led me back to my own core. I’ve worked with clergy, I’ve worked with a few life coaches and I’ve worked with many counselors both in group and one on one. My path has always brought me back to my own personal relationship with God, to my core being.

My recent prayers have been coming from a positive place and not a desperate one. My most recent answer came as simply as, “sit and smile.” Just sit, relax and smile. A smile immediately brings relief and can elevate our mood.

In an article by Mark Stibich, Ph.D., and his Top 10 Reason to Smile, he writes; “Smiling changes our mood, next time you are down, try putting on a smile. There is a good chance your mood will change for the better.”

And “Smiling releases endorphins, natural pain killers and serotonin. Together these make us make us feel good. Smiling is a natural drug.”

What have we got to lose? Just sit and smile! So here is to more smiles, more laughter, more sitting and more levity …

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

New Books! Along The Way and Another Way available on Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble

Regret

Regret
By Bernadette A. Moyer

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One of my professors was famous for saying that “regret is the hardest pill to swallow.” That phrase has stayed with me for decades now and I do my very best to try and live a life that is free of regrets.

Yet most of us probably look back on a time when we may have made decisions that we later live to regret. Bold decisions made in youth and/or in haste seldom hold up over the test of time.

“Always do your best. Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgement, self-abuse and regret.” Don Miguel Ruiz

We can’t change our past but we can learn from it and when possible we can make amends. To live a life without regrets is to live a life of peace.

No Regrets by Gary Allan (Songwriters: Jon Randall, Jamie Hanna and Gary Allan)
Well time and fate can’t be controlled
You play the hand that you’re dealt
And the dice that you rolled
And who am I to question God anyway

I remember so clearly way back in 1983 when I was leaving the gravesite where my first husband was just buried and I remember thinking; I would rather do and say something I may live to regret rather that regretting that I never did it or said it. I was so fortunate that when Randy died everything that needed to be said and done was so.

There is tremendous peace that comes from knowing we did and we said all that we could during any given life experience.

Simply doing our best is surely the best way to live without regrets!

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

New books! Another Way and Along The Way are a sold on Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble

Our Shared Journey

Our Shared Journey
By Bernadette A. Sahm

We are all more alike than not and all of us are on a shared journey. Most of us are looking for love to give love and to receive love. Some of us express our love through the work that we do and some of us in our friends and family circle. Our stories are important as are sharing them. This is how we connect with others.

Today we celebrated with our son on his 24th birthday, his father shared stories of what it was like and what transpired up until his birth and the weeks that followed. Along with his twin sister he stayed in the hospital for weeks after his birth and was unable to leave the hospital until late February after a January birthday, his twin was not released until March. I wasn’t there as I met the twins when they were already 87 days old.

The stories that my husband is able to share are both heart- warming and deeply saddening. His wife and the twin’s birth mother went into comma just days after having the twins and she never regained consciousness again. She died.

They were a young couple with a new mortgage, two career jobs and twins on the way. It was the American dream that soon turned into a living nightmare. The soul and character of my husband as he treaded these unknown waters was both concerning for his family and others and inspiring for the people that lived through it with him. His spirit and deep belief in God carried him through it all.

We delight in Brandon’s birthday and are mindful of the many challenges that he has faced since his pre-mature birth. Every single person has a story; some of us have shared experiences. The stories that my husband has to share during that time frame are so close to the heart. Now 24 years later it is still impossible to understand how a 29 year old married woman could go to the hospital to deliver her babies and how she would literally never walk out of that place again.

“When the pursuit of natural harmony is a shared journey, great heights can be attained. – Lynn Hill”

We also can’t imagine our lives being any other way as I have been their “mother” since their infancy. How and why things happen like they do may never be fully understood except that we have a deep faith in God and know that we are all here together and on a shared journey.

Who knows what each day may bring? Will it bring us happiness or heartache? Everyone is looking for something? Something that will help with the meaning of life and we want to know what will come next and what will happen. We are seeking to understand. We are looking to uncover all that we think and feel that we need to feel full.

I didn’t find genuine love and I didn’t find genuine peace until I stopped looking for it? Funny as it may seem that is what happened. When I just loved my life and was doing what I knew that I should be doing all the other things I was searching for and seeking just naturally made their way to me.

Our history and our family stories are so important as they help us to understand who we are and how we came about and just where we come from when our lives began.

So many people think that they need this thing or that job or that relationship or something else before they can be fulfilled and happy. Yet wisdom is born of age and we learn that much of what happens in life literally is beyond our control. We take what we get and hopefully we make the most of it. Take the lessons and leave the rest behind as we proceed on our shared journey called life …

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

All books on Amazon.com and Barnes and Noble under author Bernadette A. Moyer

Original artwork attached by Brandon R. Sahm (my son)

Jeans, Jean Jacket and a Jeep

Jeans, Jean Jacket and a Jeep
By Bernadette A. Moyer

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That was my dad, jeans, jean jacket and a Jeep since he wore jeans, a jean jacket and had an army green Jeep. As a little girl I was most often his side-kick and sported my own matching jeans and jean jacket as we tooled around our farm and small town in his army green Jeep.

Our farm had a mountain and 33 acres of land and dad would drive us both up that hill that had like a 95% vertical grade. It was a steep hill that most cars would never even attempt yet that Jeep made it a challenge and a fun experience that we shared together.

He was a tough guy and a man of few words. When he did speak you did listen. My husband has that same type demeanor.

I loved my dad and have many fond memories of spending time with him. I also have some really scary and dark memories of him too but I make the choice to focus on the good times. I am more and more convinced that my happy healthy and long term marriage to my husband Brian is a direct reflection on the love I had for my dad. My dad loved me too and often fought for me and stood up for me much like the love and support I have in my marriage.

I love men and am still intrigued by them, they are built and wired so differently and truth be told given the choice I prefer the straight talk demeanor of most men over the drama that many women seem to thrive upon. Not me I am a straight shooter, I also appreciate the less is more and quiet moments in the company of my husband and I can reflect upon spending many hours of quiet moments right alongside of my dad too. The joy was in just being there, being there aside of him. That was enough for me.

Men who become fathers should know just how important that father-daughter relationship is and how it translates for women into all their relationships with all other men in their life. I can’t say it enough I am certain that the success I have in my marriage is a direct reflection upon the relationship that I had with my own dad.

My father was many things and had his own share of demons, but the depth of his love and his loyalty were never lost on me. He would have taken a hit for me, his love was unwavering and if and when I did things he didn’t like or approve of it never affected the way that he treated me. His love was unwavering.

Recently, I was thinking about how my husband who as a father and how he was also such an important part of the twin’s lives. He was there and he was present. He never missed a single doctor visit, school conference, school event or outside activity. He may not have shared many words but he was always present and there for the kids. His love for them was fierce and loyal. The twins will be 24 years old soon and I look back and think just how much he loved and gave and how great a dad that he was too.

Having peace and having love with my dad allowed me to find and have peace and love with a wonderful man that I call my husband. And I am pretty sure that is how it was designed to be … appreciating my dad, jeans, jean jackets and Jeeps …

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

All books by Bernadette A. Moyer can be found on Amazon and Barnes and Noble

New books Along The Way and Another Way published in 2015

Abuse Small Word – Big Reaction

Abuse Small Word – Big Reaction
By Bernadette A Moyer

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What an insult to those that have been abused when false accusations about abuse are made. It is a very small word that carries with it a very big reaction. It seems like every young person that gets into trouble was “abused” or so it is stated by their defense attorneys as a way to defend them.

“The word “abusive” is issued so lightly these days, yet it has the effect of completely tarring and feathering the accused as completely at fault. There’s not much to think about if you are talking about an abuser. All of society will support and encourage you to turn your back.” “J”

For more than a decade I have been involved in several support groups for parents that have become estranged from their adult children. One of the single most declared reasons by the adult child is that they were “abused” by their parents. Yet when you listen to the thousands and thousands of parents who have been accused of “abuse” it just doesn’t seem to ring true. Why? Because these same parents are so grief stricken and are seeking answers and counseling and are so hurt and so humiliated and want nothing more than to make peace with the very same offspring that have used that declaration.

What I’ve learned is that one word; “abuse” will stop a parent in their tracks and send them into a complete tailspin on what to do if anything at all. Some kids have used the courts to issue orders against the parents for their perceived actions of “stalking” when parents try to visit or send gifts and cards. So what do the parents do? Most often they give up as they grieve because that is all that they have left to do. Many more are finding one another and supporting one another through various support groups.

Yes! There are kids that have been abused by their parents, and yes, there are kids that have lied about being abused by their parents. These matters need to be handled very carefully as to support a child who is abused but equally as important not “tar and feather” a parents who has been falsely accused.

There are two stories that were communicated to me by the child who grew up and later regretted their actions of false abuse allegations. One successfully integrated back into the family and the other was not as lucky.

Here there are;
When Jane (not her real name) was visiting with a family member she called “911” to report that her parents were “abusing her” the call was traced and Jane was identified. The parents were investigated and deemed “unfounded” allegations. It turned out that Jane was angry with mom and dad and this was her way of getting back at them. Jane came to her senses and was truly sorry and her parents never held it against her. Jane now in her 30’s has a very happy adult relationship with both parents.

When Sue (not her real name) had the car privileges taken away from her at age 17 because of her poor grades in high school, she retaliated by slamming herself up against the car and then called “911” when the police arrived she showed them her red marks on her body. Sue told the police her father did that to her and dad was immediately arrested. He never had any record or other issues with the law. Sue eventually told the truth and dad was released, however he was unable to forgive Sue and no longer wanted her living in the family home. She came of age living with extended family. Their relationship never fully recovered.

Seldom do victims that have been abused speak out so freely, often because they are shame-filled. The ones who so easily and readily throw the words “abuse” and “abused” around, probably should be looked at more closely as to what truly is their motivation.

As a young wife and mother myself, I used to subscribe to the theory that “kids never lie” I have since learned that kids, just like adults, can and do lie and most often it is about manipulation. One of my greatest regrets in dealing with children is that when I was confronted with a child who claimed to be “abused” I not only instantly believed them but I also gave them a big reaction and I coveted them. From that day forward I tried to shield them from any other harm in any way that I could. Decades later I can clearly see where my “big reaction” helped to create someone who learned how to achieve “big reactions” all the rest of their life and learned how easily they could manipulate others into doing for them, protecting them and fighting for them. They now have a very long documented history of how they have been “victimized” and “abused.” They also have a documented list of people that have fought for them all of their adult life.

Think about how we treat someone, anyone who declares that they have been “abused” we immediately want to protect them and fight for them. There are many kids and adults who are smart enough to learn how to use this to their advantage.

As a young married woman I sought out counseling just after I was first married. My first husband had epilepsy and I needed help learning how to deal with it. The first group meeting I attended they said “you are only a victim if you choose to be.” This has stuck with me for decades now. The thought was that yes, you could truly be “victimized” but if you decide to stay there in “victimization” it is by your own choice …

People that survive and thrive after hurtful life experiences inspire me. People that dwell on their hurts and losses and choose not to move past it and learn from them, well, over time they become really unattractive. Part of growing up and part of maturing is accepting that life is not perfect, people are not perfect and to learn to take what you get and to make the most of it.

Some people are truly abused and victimized and some people wear “abuse” as a crutch so people will feel sorry for them do for them and so they can go about life with their own self- proclaimed narrative. Whereas there are other victims that are not as easy to identify because they don’t hold themselves out as “victims” but rather as “survivors.”

True story (Donna not her real name) and I were friends for about a decade before I learned that she was a rape survivor. We took trips together and we wrote together and although she was old enough to be my mother, we were friends and colleagues. There was never anything about her attitude or anything about her demeanor that said “abuse” victim. It amazed me that she had such a healthy attitude and no visible signs of being a victim.

Broken-Trust-And-Anger

The beauty of life is that even the most challenging, difficult, unattractive and yes “abusive” experiences can be turned around for the greater good, for the lessons to be learned and to cherish the human spirit that says, I am so much better than any one life experience and I have the ability and the capacity to move above it and beyond it.

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.Facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

All books by Bernadette A. Moyer can be found on Amazon and Barnes and Noble

I Am in Love With Hope

I Am In Love With Hope
By Bernadette A. Moyer

“We live in hope and we die in despair.” Charles Dickens

“A leader is a dealer in hope.” Napoleon Bonaparte

“Everything that is done in the world is done by hope.” Martin Luther

“Hope sees the invisible, feels the intangible and achieves the impossible.” Charles Caleb Colton

I could go on and on quoting really greats quotes that direct us toward hope, without hope and faith we die. I am a “hope” junkie! I live on it and I am in love with hope!

Without it, what would we have? We hope for a better world, we hope for better health, we hope for sunny days, we hope for bigger bank accounts, we hope for good friends, we hope for success. We hope for love and for peace and for purpose. We hope for better days.

But what is hope, is it an idea, a thought, a way of life, prayer? Is hope about having faith? I don’t think a day goes by where I am not hopeful and filled with hope and faith.

There is such a great high that comes from hoping that all things go well, it’s a brand new year and a fresh new start to all that we are hoping for in our lifetime. Are we building a new house, starting a new career, having a new baby, looking for that perfect life partner, are we living in a way that all that we wish and hope for comes our way?

Do we hope and pray for better health and for a better joy with an increase in pay, are we hoping that our children will learn and will grow and will become a new generation of “hopeful” adults?

What would we become without hope? We live in hope and I am in love with hope. Hope for all that is good and great, hope for a better world for all of us. Hope it is a really good thing! Hope doesn’t cost anything but prepares us and sets us up for all that we hope and dream for in our lives.

Hope … what are you hoping for in this brand New Year… it starts with a thought with a desire with a willingness to believe that what we hope for can actually become realized.

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

All books by Bernadette A. Moyer are available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble

An Amazing Love Story!

An Amazing Love Story!
By Bernadette A. Sahm

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It is an amazing love story and it is ours! My husband has often said, “Wouldn’t it have been great if we met in high school and started our relationship then?” My answer is always the same, “no because we would not have been ready for one another.”

In my view our timing was just right and some have even called it “a marriage made in heaven, by heaven.” We were both widowed with children when we met and we had both been pretty broken up by some life events. We knew what it feels like to be hurt by love.

No one is more surprised by how happy and content I am in our 24 year relationship than me, in the past I was averaging about 5-years as a “long-term” relationship. After 5-years I was either bored or broken.

Brian and I have faced many life altering events together, we came together with two broken families and tried to merge two half’s to make a whole. I give him the credit for having the patience he has with me. Early on he often said, “You are not alone.” This was in response to my extreme independence and my history of going it alone. I had trust issues and they were multi-layered.

I came from a family that had no boundaries when I was growing up and severely lacked any respect. Sadly this has remained the same throughout adulthood. And learning to let my guard down and to trust was really difficult for me. I did not come from a loving family, hard as it is to admit it, it is the absolute truth.

Whereas Brain grew up knowing that his parents loved him and that they were really proud of him. He also credits sports as the vehicle that saved him from growing up in the inner city that was surrounded by poverty, drugs and violence.

I always knew that my father loved me and I always suspected that my mother did not. When I was born she remained in the hospital and I was sent home. She had difficulties after giving birth to me. My father favored me and I was his female namesake. When she died I was excluded from her obituary as though I never existed. Affirmed and affirmed over and over again, our strained relationship.

When I left home I immediately jumped into yet another abusive relationship, this was what was known to me and what felt normal. It took a lot of strength and a lot of work to rise above it and to move away from abusive relationships. Today I have zero tolerance for any abuse that is directed toward me, I don’t just walk away, I run and I seal the door shut. I now know better.

Brian and I both knew there was a better way … and together we created that better way. That doesn’t mean that during the early years we weren’t challenged and we certainly did our fair share of hurting one another. Our commitment to our union was always stronger than any desire to flee. We loved each other and we wanted to work through our challenges and we wanted to do it together as a team.

We truly enjoy each other and I can’t tell you how often I have heard, “Brian doesn’t talk to anyone or Brian doesn’t talk to me.” Yet from day 1 we had conversations that went on for hours. I literally couldn’t shut him up! Today he may not initially talk to new people but he does once he trusts them.

He is really good at checking people out and makes really great character decisions. So back to ours is a love story and what makes it so …

First off we are attracted to one another I think he is handsome and he finds me attractive, yep it’s pretty primal but then right after that is that we have so much in common and that we like the same things. We grew up in the same period of time and still enjoy classic rock and roll music and much of what the 70’s were all about.

And even though we are really close, travel a lot together and spend so much time together he makes me laugh with conversations like this one that just took place yesterday. Me: so what are you watching? Him: Football because that’s what men do on Sunday’s. I just laugh and keep cooking! Oh my God, did he really just say that!

My husband really loves me and I really love him, we really like each other too. Pretty basic but that is the secret to our happy marriage and we respect one another. We have boundaries that we have built a very safe, loving and lasting love affair upon … ours is a favorite love story and I hope that yours is too.

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer

All books by Bernadette A. Moyer are available on Amazon and Barnes and Noble

Forget New Year’s Resolutions!

Forget New Year’s Resolutions!
By Bernadette A. Moyer

affirmations

Forget resolutions this year I am going with affirmations! Can anyone remember what “resolutions” they made last year?

And I bet that if you do it is because you have the same ones lined up yet again for this year. Me, I am not doing them, not again, no resolutions this year! Nope! Nada not!

Every year it is the same thing all the home shopping networks are selling gym equipment and all the weight loss places have a special “FREE this month” join us now ads. This probably after most of us packed it on during the holidays. Well I didn’t overindulge this year nor did I pack it on with that I will get to it later approaches to diet and good health.

Then how long does it last before we are “off” of our plan and binge eating again? It seems like a push me pull me existence.
So this year I have decided to go with affirmations, all positive talk in an effort to meet my goals. Things like “you rock!” “you are great” “you are full” “enough” “love more” “live more” all positive talk speak to reach my target. I am deliberately NOT going to deny myself but affirm myself. Going with the positive affirmations, messages like “you can do it!”

I am jumping in and I am naming the year 2016 as my affirmation year! No resolutions, no more setting myself up or starting something I won’t or don’t finish. The year of positive living and affirmations already sounds so much better than “my resolutions!”

I have affirmations! I already feel light and free and like there are endless possibilities and I won’t be limited or boxed in, like the sky is the limit and there are so many wonderful things I want to affirm … positive living = positive outcomes.

Okay here goes …

I love and accept myself unconditionally
I approve of myself and feel great about myself
I am unique and a very special person
I am free and make my own choices and decisions
I radiate love and respect
I am well loved
I deserve all that is good and I release any need for misery and suffering

My mind is full of gratitude for my lovely and wonderful life
I am never alone, the universe supports me.

Today and every day the door is open for endless opportunities
Bye bye to New Year’s resolutions and hello affirmations! It already feels so much better!

Happy New Year 2016! It is going to be the best year ever!

Bernadette on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/bernadetteamoyer